- June 15, 2022 Social Justice
Sister Nancy Corcoran serves in a “ministry of accompaniment” with parents of transgender children
By Jenny Beatrice
In 2003, Kim Hutton and her husband were blessed with a little girl. Or so they thought. At two years old, Kim’s child looked in the bathroom mirror and proclaimed, “I a boy.” That moment was the beginning of Kim’s journey as a parent of a transgender child.
Kim became an advocate for her child as well as for other families going through the transgender experience. She founded the organization TransParent USA, whose mission is to bring compassionate support to parents and caregivers navigating complex issues faced by gender-expansive individuals. In St. Louis, TransParent meets monthly at Children’s Hospital, offering parents the opportunity to share their stories and offer insights to one another.
As someone who has been a supportive presence in St. Louis’ Metro Trans Umbrella Group for LGBTQ communities, Sister Nancy Corcoran was invited to attend one of these sessions. It was an invitation that blossomed into, what she calls, “a ministry of accompaniment” with the parents. For those who are Catholic and grieving the loss of not feeling welcome in their church communities, S. Nancy’s presence speaks volumes. “She’s a wonderful advocate for our children,” Kim says. “We appreciate so much what she’s trying to do inside the Catholic faith. We have a number of families in TransParent that are Catholic, and I think to have someone from the inside helping us is very encouraging to a lot of our parents of faith.” We talked to S. Nancy about her “ministry of accompaniment” and what it means to the parents—and to her.
What does a “ministry of accompaniment” mean to you?
“Accompaniment” means that I show up. I attend meetings sponsored by the Metro Trans Umbrella Group, St. Louis PFLAG, TransParent and Washington University’s Gender Clinic’s Community Partners. I don’t actually “do” anything. I remind parents that God created their children, and their only job is to continue to love them unconditionally.
What were the parents’ reactions when they found out you are a Catholic sister?
For the first six months, the only thing I said at the meeting was “Pass” when it was my turn to speak. Finally, I was so touched by their stories that I shared that I was a Sister of St. Joseph, and that I thought of the meeting as a Holy Hour because I was learning about unconditional love, which the parents demonstrate in the face of societal and church rejection. I believe my presence brings hope to the parents that society and the church will someday make the world a better place for their children.
What have you learned from these parents and their experiences?
I have learned that unconditional love is imperative. It is necessary to follow your child’s lead in learning who they are. Parents must back away from toxic teachings and people. Parents must privately grieve the loss of their son/daughter even as they publicly celebrate the presence of their new child.
How can the church work to better understand the transgender experience?
Holy Scripture cannot be used as a science book. Truths uncovered by science must be recognized as theology evolves. Presently, the church is relying on a literal understanding of scripture “male and female, He created them.” I, too, believed that humans came in only two sexes, a binary of male and female. I had never heard
the term “intersex.” Trans children and gender-expansive children are challenging this binary. God creates on a continuum. God created day and night but also dawn and dusk. I have come to understand that how we express gender is on a continuum.
My hope for the Church is humility and flexibility in light of scientific research.
Why, as a CSJ, are you called to this ministry?
As a Sister of St. Joseph, I am continually called to the “more.” As Sisters of St. Joseph, we are challenged to “go deeper, journey farther, respond boldly and dare to be prophetic.” We are called to do what Jesus did.
How could I not respond to be a presence with humans who are expanding our concept of what it is to be completely oneself, to live with integrity, to challenge society’s givens in the face of great opposition? How could I not feel the call to love and minister with the “dear neighbor without distinction?”